


we've met so many times that i've lost count

by defunced (starries)



Category: Free!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, M/M, Reincarnation, Reincarnation AU, is this considered character death?, just lots of brief mentionings about lots of aus
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-25
Updated: 2014-09-25
Packaged: 2018-02-17 22:24:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,029
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2325356
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starries/pseuds/defunced
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There were times where they met and didn't know each other, and there were times they never met and knew each other all too well.<br/> </p><p>In every lifetime, no matter how brief, they always meet.</p>
            </blockquote>





	we've met so many times that i've lost count

**Author's Note:**

> I just wanna say that this fic was inspired alot by the KageHina fanfic called A Hundred or So Hellos by iwillstillopenthewindow. If you like kagehina read that one because its beautifully written ^^ and there may be mistakes since this is unbeta'd

Haru waits for Rin at the train station. They were going to go shopping for swimming gear but Rin was late. Haru frowns. Rin was the one who planned it, so why was he late? Haru walks toward the the sidewalk. He's going to check if he could see Rin.  
  
  
  
As he arrives at the corner next to the street he sees a blotch of red in the gray and white winter scenery. Rin. Haru scowls. Rin looks at him apologetically and waves his hand. He starts running across the street but didn't see it coming. No one did.   
  
  
  
Rin's still in the middle of the street when Haru sees it. His eyes widen and he desperately cries out. "O-oi, Rin, watch out-" But it's too late. It comes crashing. Everything did. The truck hits Rin. Haru's eyes widen even more. He runs to Rin's body, now in a small pool of blood that's growing larger by the second. Haru shakes Rin's body and calls out his name. Over and over. Everything comes crashing in Haru's world. Everything gets drowned out. All Haru could do is shake Rin's still, limp body and call his name.  
  
  
  
Haru doesn't register anything. Not the other people gathering around. Not the calls. Not when the ambulance takes Rin away from Haru's arms. He can't think. He can't feel anything when he is ushered into the back of the car along with the doctors. Everything feels numb for Haru. 

* * *

Haru's in the hospital lobby with Makoto, Nagisa, Rei, Sousuke, and Rin's family. Haru is beginning to feel again. He waits with the others for the doctor. Rin's family is sobbing. Everyone else is crying too. Except Haru. He doesn't shed tears, but everyone knows he's crying the most on the inside.

  
  
_Rin is going to be ok. He is going to be alright._ Haru reassures himself over and over again. He thinks, maybe if he reassures himself over and over again enough times, it would become true and that he can believe it, too.   
  
  
  
The doctor comes out with a solemn look of his face. Haru tightens his fists and feels something start bubbling inside of him. Everyone looked at his expectantly, full of broken hope. The doctor just shakes his head. "It was too late, he lost too much blood." Everyone starts crying even more. Haru all of a sudden went numb again. This wasn't true. It couldn't be. But it is. Haru walks over to Rin's family. He has to apologize. He has to apologize for taking away their son. But he can't say anything. Rin's mother just looks at him with her tear-stained face and puts her hand on his cheek. "It's not your fault. It was no one's fault." she brushes her thumb across the tears that falls down Haru's face that he didn't know of. He can never tell Rin how much he loves him. How much he means to him.  
  
  
  
Everything feels wrong. All wrong  
  
  
  
And then, Haru is crying along side everyone else.

* * *

Rin's funeral meant nothing to Haru. What was the point? Haru doesn't want to hear that Rin died. He doesn't want to see people cry. It just hurts him more. He hurt, yet felt numb at the same time. Haru just stares blankly toward the front. The funeral goes by in a blur of black, gray, and white. Just like what Haru is feeling.

* * *

Haru becomes broken after that. He doesn't do anything. He stays home. Doesn't even swim or bathe. He only does things when Makoto comes over with a sad face on and cooks and takes of him. Then Makoto tries talk to Haru with fake happiness in his voice, but Haru never responds. He just stares at nothing with lifeless eyes. Makoto leaves choking back tears of his own.  
  
  
  
Haru doesn't feel anything after that.   
  
  
  
He's walking to the grocery store, slowly. He needs to. Makoto makes him. But Haru doesn't want to. What's the point? To Haru there is none. So when he gets hit, he doesn't feel anything. He doesn't hear the screams and cries. He just slips away.

* * *

 And just like that Makoto, Nagisa, Rei, and eveyone else is crying again. And they have to attend another black and white funeral. 

* * *

Haru is 18. Going to the pool from his university.  
  
  
  
He sits on the bus listening to the low, dull hum of the engine. A screech. People pile on and a man with wine-red hair walks to the seat next to Haru's. "Is this seat taken?" Haru turns his head to face a face he feels like he's seen before. "No."  
  
  
  
The man smiles and sits down.  
  
  
  
The bus screeches again and the man gets up to get off. The man gets off the bus.  
  
  
  
Haru hears about a car crash and a dead man on the news. He flicks the TV off before he sees who it was.

* * *

Haru walks past the soccer field. A soccer ball stops at his feet. He turns to see who it belongs to. A teen with maroon eyes waves at him and asks him to kick it back. Haru does.  
  
  
  
The guy, Rin Matsuoka, follows him and talks to him all the time now ever since then. He says that how Haru kicked the ball was amazing and asks if he plays soccer. Haru just listens, occasionally responding. Haru doesn't dislike or like Matsuoka, so he just lets him hang around him. That goes on for about two weeks.  
  
  
  
The principal announces that Matsuoka died from a concussion. Haru turns his head and stares at the ground.  

* * *

Haru is 25 and walking down the street to his office job. He sees dull gray everywhere. His life was boring. So very boring.  
  
  
  
He sees a shock of red hair along with the grays and hears an all too familiar laugh among the boring buzz of the city. Haru whips his head around but the red is already gone.   
  
  
  
Haru keeps walking and goes on with his life. He dreams of bright red that for awhile after that.

* * *

Haru stands there in his little restaurant. He is a chef of a pretty popular restaurant.  
  
  
  
He sighs. As popular as it is, there is no one here at the moment. Business has been pretty slow today  
  
  
  
He hears a bell jingle and turns his head. He comes face to face with a man his age with red hair tied back into a ponytail and and cop hat. There's another man behind him but Haru doesn't care. He keeps staring at the red-haired man.  
  
  
  
The redhead walks up to the counter after he talks with the other cop. "Two coffees, please." Haru nods his head and makes them their coffee. They take it and walk out.  
  
  
  
The next week, Haru reads in the newspaper about a cop shot on duty. He doesn't see who it was and has to pry his eyes away before he can when he hears the bells jingle.

* * *

Rin and Haru have been dating for about half a year now.   
  
  
  
Rin's going to move into Haru's house. Haru taps the table with his finger impatiently. Rin hasn't called him yet. He looks at the clock. 30 minutes late. Haru sighs and jumps at the sound of his phone buzzing. He started using his phone alot more ever since they began dating. Haru picks it up and says in annoyed voice, "Why are you so late?" "Ah-" Rin sounds apologetic, "s-sorry, I was going to drive there but then I forgot to pack somethings and there's also a lot of traffic." "Mm, where are you now?" "In the car, I'm almost th-" Rin is interrupted by a loud crashing noise and then the phone gets disconnected.  
  
  
  
Rin dies on the way to the hospital. Haru has to quietly cry himself to sleep for the next few weeks. 

* * *

Haru's a doctor. He looks at the files of a patient named Rin Matsuoka. A terminal diesease. He wouldn't live long. Haru places the patient's files back.  
  
  
  
Haru has to tell the man's family about his death the next day. He hates seeing them cry.

* * *

Haru stands on the starting block for Japan at the Olympics. He looks around the stadium. The bright lights and cheers make him a bit light headed. He glances over at the person next to him. Red hair underneath a black swimming cap. Haru gets into a starting position. The whistle blows and they're off. They look like they're flying through the water.  
  
  
  
Japan comes first. Sydney a close second. 

* * *

It's silent in the library Haru works at. Only the quiet mumbles of people studying. Haru pushes his glasses up and keeps reading.  
  
  
  
But the silence is interrupted by a loud redhead and his friend. Haru and some others in the library glares at them. They quiet down after that and walk to the bookshelves.  
  
  
  
The man with wine-red hair comes up to Haru a few minutes later with a sheepish look on his face. "Uh, where do I find books about swimming?" Haru looks at him with his stoic face and writes something down. "Turn right, and then left and you'll see a shelf about sports. They should be there." The man takes the piece of paper and nods. And before the man goes off to find his books, Haru swears he sees him turn around and wink at him.  
  
  
  
The man comes day after day now. Sometimes coming up and trying to talk to Haru and sometimes just reading a book at a table near him. No matter what he does, the man always comes. Haru sometimes catches the redhead staring at him, before he turns away, blushing. How cute.  
  
  
  
But then the redhead stops coming. Haru tries not to notice, but whenever Haru scans the library, his eyes would always linger on the place the man used to sit. Haru never notices that he was always looking forward to seeing the man until that day.

* * *

Haru walks down the quiet street. He sees a man with red hair walk out of an apartment building in a hurry. As Haru walks past him, he sees the man accidentally drop his wallet on the ground. The raven-haired man picks it up and taps the other man's shoulder. When the man turns around, Haru hands the man his wallet. The latter gives him a "thanks" and they both keep walking on.

* * *

"Haru!" Haru turns to the sound of the voice. _Ah, it's Rin._ Rin's gotten attached to Haru when he saw the teen swimming in a relay a while back. The elementary schooler runs up to Haru. "Can you teach me how to swim?" he asks cheerfully. Haru turns his head to look at the ocean. "Why me? Can't you just ask a coach?" Haru says in a dull tone. "But, your swimming was so beautiful! I wanna be taught by you!" Haru sighs. This happens everyday. Rin asking Haru to teach him how to swim and Haru rejecting. But that didn't stop Rin from asking everyday. Even though Haru rejects him when he asks him to teach him how to swim, Rin always clings to Haru.  
  
  
  
Haru sits at the swings where he would usually see and play with Rin. The red-haired child never comes. That continues for days until Haru decides to ask if Rin's ok or if he's sick.   
  
  
  
Haru knocks on the door of Rin's house. Rin's mother opens the door with a tear-stained face. When she sees that its Haru, her face becomes more sad and pained. Haru immediately asks if something was wrong and she chokes out, "R-rin drowned in the ocean a few days back-" Haru's eyes widened in shock, "we were going to tell you later but..."  
  
  
  
Haru runs like mad. He had asked where Rin's grave was. It was next to their father's. Haru climbs up the hill and spots the grave. It's a bit smaller than the one next to it and looks cleaner and newer. Rin's grave. Haru collapses on the ground and sees his tears hit the dirt.

* * *

Haru and Makoto walk into the flower shop. Makoto wanted flowers for his new apartment, so Haru follows him in since they were hanging out that day. When they're in, Haru's eyes are immediately drawn to the red ones looking right back. "Welcome." the florist says with a smile. He then turns and concentrates on the bouquet he's working on. Makoto smiles back and walks to the corner of the shop where the lotus flowers were located. Haru follows. He stands next to Makoto and keeps glancing at the man working on the bouquet.  
  
  
  
Makoto decides on the flowers, which were the lotus flowers and went to the counter. The man looks up and smiles again. "Same as mine, huh. Is that all?" Makoto nods and the man tells him the price.  
  
  
  
The last thing Haru sees before they leave the shop is the bouquet the florist is working on.  White lotus flowers.

* * *

Haru hears his doorbell ring. He doesn't answer right away, doesn't want to. The doorbell rings again. And again. And again. Haru sighs and gets up. When he opens the door, he's greeted by a man with bright red eyes and an even brighter smile.  
  
  
  
"Hey! I'm Rin Matsuoka. I, uh, recently moved in and, well, I'm your neighbor-" he lets out a nervous chuckle "and I wanted to say hi?" Haru stares at him. The man looks so familiar to Haru and yet doesn't at the same time. "Yea..." "Yea? Is that all?" Matsuoka gave out another laugh but this time it was a genuine one.  
  
  
  
Haru and Rin were sitting at a small seafood restaurant. Over the few weeks Rin has moved in they hung out alot. They've become friends, so to say. "Mackerel." Rin laughs at Haru's order. Haru loves his laugh. It always makes his chest feel warm. "I knew you would get that. Why don't you ever try anything else?" Haru gives him an annoyed glare. Rin laughs again. Haru's chest tightens and feels warm again.  
  
  
  
Haru knocks on Rin's door. He was late, and it was his idea to go eat out again. He knocks again. Nothing. Another neighbor passes by and stops. "Oh, if you're looking for the resident who lives here, Matsuoka-san was it? He moved out a day ago-" Haru freezes. "- he said to give this to you." Haru takes the note into his hands. __  
  
  
  
_Sorry Haru, some family emergency came up and I had to move back._  
Also sorry for asking you to eat out with me but then I' m not there.  
  
                                                                                                      - _Rin Matsuoka_  
  
  
  
Haru walks back to his own apartment. He crumples the note in his hand. How stupid.  
  
  
  
His chest feels cold and empty now.

* * *

Haru sits at the bus stop and stares at the blank page in his sketchbook. He sighs. He doesn't know what to draw for his assignment. A man comes and sits next to him, waiting for the bus. Haru glances out of curiousity and scans the man's body. How he looks, what he was wearing.  
  
  
  
Haru turns in a drawing of the man for his assignment.

* * *

He takes picture after picture, but none satisfy him.  
  
  
  
Haru lets out a sigh. He would have to call it a day. It's getting late and the sun's beginning to set. But he stills to takes one more. The lake was shimmering, and the snow covered everything in a blanket of white. How could he not?  
  
  
  
Haru arrives at his studio and sighs as he closes the door. He drops his bag down and turns on his camera to look at the photos he took today. He flicks through all the photos. None were that good. None he would want to keep. But Haru stops at the last one. The one where the lake shimmered. He can see a small body underneath the bare tree next to the lake. The man was turned around but Haru can see his black trench coat and red hair that stood out from the white.  
  
  
  
He doesn't know why, but Haru keeps that one.

* * *

Haru sits in his seat. The teacher said that a transfer student was coming so she would be just a bit late. Haru doesn't care. It's not like the other child will have anything to do with Haru. Oh, how wrong Haru is.  
  
  
  
The other child comes in. A flash of red. And another. Haru feels a wave of nostalgia wash over him. "Hi, I'm Rin Matsuoka. I previously went to Sano Elementary. I have a girly name, but I'm a boy! I'm looking forward to meeting you all!" He throws toothy grin. Haru tightens his hands around the edge of his seat. Nostalgia. Calming, mysterious, and a bit saddening nostalgia.  
  
  
  
Haru now has red in his life.

* * *

"Why isn't it free? I just wanted to swim with you guys." Rin's crying on Haru. Haru smiles fondly up at Rin.  _Ah, here he is. This is the real Rin. I finally found him._ And Haru realizes, again, that he loves Rin. Very much so.  
  
  
  
"Rin, come! I'll show you a sight you've never seen before!" Haru holds out his hand to Rin. And Rin takes it.

* * *

It's a month after Rin and Haru made up. Rin is staying at Haru's house for the weekend.  
  
  
  
"Hey, Rin, I love you." Rin whips his head around to face Haru. He stares and Haru sees a deep blush creeping across his face. It's silent for a long time before Rin speaks, "D-did you mean it?" Haru nods with a gentle smile and a faint blush on his face. Rin leans in to kiss Haru in the sweltering summer heat.

* * *

Rin's crying from happiness and Haru is smiling. Cheers and cries echo in the stadium. The lights are blinding. Rin's arm is draped around Haru. Then Rin faces Haru and kisses him, right in front of the world.  
  
  
  
"Excuse me, but can you look this way for the camera?"  
  
  
  
Haru and Rin both face the camera and smile with gold medals hanging around their necks. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
_fin._

**Author's Note:**

> I really wanted to write a reincarnation au after i saw a book about it so here you go ^^ and i think god or whoever was just trying to bring rin and haru back together cause theyre basically soulmates but he takes a LONG detour xD 
> 
> i was listening to paradise fears' album Yours Truly while writing this so... T^T


End file.
